This article is inspired by an encounter I had with this man.
Man: "Hey. I was wondering if you had a man in your life? Maybe we could get lunch."
Me: "Actually, I do. I'm whole married!"
Man: "What? You look so young! Why'd you get married so early?"
While, I don't understand what response he was expecting to get, I can't say I've never heard this before.
For those who don't know, I'm 21. I got married when I was 20 and my husband was 22. From the moment I shared the news with family, friends, and the internet I've been asked constantly in some way, shape, or form why I got married so early. So, here it is: WHY I got married so early.
Kalin and I are really the best of friends. When I tell you he's been by my side since I was a freshman in high school, I mean that. He's always been a light in my life, ready to help and listen. So, naturally when he asked me to be his wife in the best way possible, it didn't come across my mind for a single moment that it'd be a bad idea! After my adrenaline stopped rushing, Kalin left to go back to Georgia, and I was alone again, I started to stress all over again. I called him asking what this meant for us and what did we have to do (or more so what did it mean for ME!). Kalin assured me there was never any pressure to do anything. He made sure that anything we did was because we wanted to and NOT what everyone else wanted. He had absolutely no expectations for us and never judged any thoughts we had ABOUT getting married (good or bad). Adapting that mindset took all that stress and destroyed it.
I feel like a huge part of our fear about people marrying "young" or "early" isn't because we aren't wise enough to know if this is what we want, but fear that we aren't confident enough to stick by it. If you love someone and y'all want to marry: DO IT. No one knows your relationship or your love the same way you do,so why in the universe would you allow that person to dictate things pertaining to it?
And what's the worst that could happen? Y'all go a little bit and hate each other? Then divorce. That's not the end of the world. Especially, if you're young. P.s. There's also nothing wrong with waiting on marriage or not doing it all. The point is that YOU know what rocks for you. If you're in a relationship and you have been for a while and you feel pressure to marry and that's not what you want, tell them to talk to the hand because the FACE IS NOT LISTENING. Don't allow them to guilt you with money, children, incentives, etc. You do you and the rest will fall into place. I pinky promise. So, that's why I got married so early. Because I wanted to.
